Recently the 15-year-old daughter of an Indian movie star had her images splashed all over the country’s social media platforms. At 13, she had been chubby and gawky and two years later, her new slim and svelte look has inspired millions of young people to become her fans and followers.
Closer to home, I recently met a mother who put her teenage daughter on a strict diet to knock off the extra pounds before she leaves for school next year. I am all about looking and feeling fit, but this sounded so wrong. The girl was not fat and at best she could use some outdoor sports or just a run, not a diet.
Whether we’re looking at celebrities’ photos and their fabulous lives or comparing ourselves to our friends and neighbours, we are constantly faced with parameters set by us and by society. And these we have passed on to our children. Asking a child to fit into a mould to be acceptable at college gives him/her the message that he/she is not good enough right now.
Right from the time our children are born we brainwash them. We use various outlets that encourage conformity. What do our children really learn through games and sports? This generation’s video games are more intense than ours. Often the objective is to “finish the bad guy” or “win the race”. Most girls have played with a Barbie at some point. The doll sets the stage for materialistic attitudes and dictates the role and expectations of what a woman should look like.
We all want the best for our children and often live our dreams vicariously through them. How many times do we pass on our limiting beliefs to our children? “Money doesn’t grow on trees”; “Don’t colour outside the lines”; “Don’t opt for Humanities, take up Science”. In our endeavour to give our children the best, we often forget that they have individual wiring. This results in them growing into teenagers and adults who are lost; confused and aimless. They may be superlatively qualified academically, but emotionally, they do not know what they want because they were never asked.
