Kids understand every lyric of every song. It’s really quite amazing. No matter how mumbled and garbled the words, or how nonsensical, they just get it. It’s quite amazing. Their parents also understand lyrics. Just, possibly, ever so slightly differently.

Examples of famous misheard lyrics, (I’m a 100% convinced these were put together by parents), include: Every time you go away, you take a piece of meat with you (No prizes, it’s ‘me’), Save the whale, Save the whale (sail away, sail away). Priceless! And then there’s the one about the man who called a radio station asking for his favourite song, Yamaha Yamaso. After a frantic search, the poor radio jockey had to confess he had never heard of this song. Whereupon the irate caller played him the song – You’re my heart, you’re my soul. There was a time when I laughed till I cried, trying to imagine these weird people who actually thought their lyrics made sense.

Kids of all ages around the world get twice the entertainment out of songs. Once from the original, and a second time over when they hear their parent’s version!

It’s just a given, the young know it alls who effortlessly ‘get it’, while the adults strain to decipher and decode these cryptic messages set to music. It baffles me why we lose this magical ability when we become parents. I read something very scientific sounding, about reduced audio frequency ranges or something. Sounds as unclear to me as mumble rap. Yeah, I know stuff like that!

Some of my fondest memories, growing up, are of my dad soulfully belting out the Scorpions’ hit song, Holiday. Usually literally just the word Holiday, sometimes with the beginning of the sentence ‘Let me take you far away’ thrown in before that.

We’d stop what we’re doing, giggling, and waiting to see if he’d surprise with the next line this time. But no, it’d be what we knew was coming: “God alone knows what they’re saying in between”, he’d grumble, “can’t understand a word they’re singing. Would it kill them to be a bit clearer?”. While we stared in utter disbelief, such perfect enunciation!!

That was my pride and joy as a teenager. Ah the days, when all I had to do was hear a song once and not only was that enough for me to get the tune and lyrics down pat. I’d remember the lyrics forever after that.

Flash forward to 2018. I pride myself on my eclectic music taste and being ‘down’ with current music. My kids are cringing as they read that. They do, however, like being able to discuss music with me. I’ve actually even introduced them to a couple of songs, and we enjoy singing along to the radio in the car.

Misheard lyrics

Where I make the most of the ambient car noises, and usually get away with whatever words I choose to fit into the tune.

Until I was happily ‘oohlaalalaa’ing’ along to a particular song, and they both stopped short, with exasperated expressions. “Ma, he’s saying ‘Swallalala’. Heated debate ensues. Very short lived. They quickly put an end to it with “MA!! The name of the song itself, is Swalla!” Hmm. Don’t know why he can’t sing clearly. Still sounds like oohlalala to me. Even on the 50th rewind. How hard is it to make a sibilant ‘ss’ for Pete’s sake?

Guess that’s when it hit me. Hard. After a mere 20 years in the role, I have officially become a parent. So, let the era of misheard lyrics begin! Since I’ve anyway started forgetting lyrics to even my golden oldies, I might as well embrace my parent status, and not stress myself unnecessarily. I now have carte blanche to sing parent-lyrics!

I’ll just turn up the volume on my favourite cheery tune on the children’s station, ‘I had a goat, I had a goat...’ The kids for some strange reason insist it’s ‘I had a go’. Sigh.

Bina Mathews is a freelancer based in the UAE.