The good news is you will now live longer because of the spectacular advances in medical technology, but the bad news is you will work longer!

Every day doctors treat people with bad hearts, clean out their arteries, give them a new lease of life and within a week the person is back sitting at his workplace — as if nothing had happened.

I read somewhere that because of the wonderful inventions in the health-care sector, your child or children will not be able to retire and have to continue working till their 80s.

Earlier, you were told that if you wish to enjoy a fulfilling, retired life (not the one where you go hopping off cruise ships and exotic islands) you will have to save more to build up a reasonably hefty nest egg or invest your money aggressively. If that is not possible, there is now the third option of working longer. Imagine living up to 100 and working late into the winter of your life. The workplace will be cramped with grumpy old men and women.

Natasha: “I ticked off the HR today as I was climbing up the stairs.”

Bashir: “Oh, you still climb the stairs. I know it’s good exercise, but doesn’t it take ages?”

Natasha: “Haha, funny. Watch it or I will loosen the brakes on your wheelchair.”

Kapoor butting into the conversation: “Did you guys see my wedding ring. I left it at the sink at the washroom and it has disappeared. If I don’t find it my wife will kill me.”

Sarah, peering from her desk: “Kapoor, you told us your wife passed away last year.”

Kapoor, pensively: “Then who is the woman in my flat?”

Sarah: “Maybe it is a ghost. Or maybe that absentminded woman in procurement on the third floor.”

Boss smiling and rubbing his hands as he walks into the room: “How is everybody? Wait, please forget I asked that!”

Natasha: “When will we get our new extended health insurance? You promised us we will be fully covered by June.”

Boss: “The doctors at the insurance company are still working on it. They are not sure whether you all should be covered till 80 years or 92.”

Kapoor: “They are cheats. Hanifa had a fight with them. They said no pregnancy coverage after 65 years. Who are they to dictate when we can have children? Next they will say no facelifts and that will be a disaster.”

Boss: “Let’s get some work done today shall we? But first enjoy the gluten-free, fibre-full, sugarless donuts I picked up at ‘Say No Bakeries’. Who is this? (looking at a man staring at him shortsightedly)”

Natasha: “That’s my boyfriend. Its Bring Your Spouse to Work Day today.”

Boss: “Natasha, boyfriends and cats are not allowed. Didn’t you read the circular that was sent out last week? What’s the first thing on the agenda? Hey, where is everyone going?”

The A team: “We have to use the washroom.”

The author of a bestselling book, Work, Work, Work, says people should start getting prepared for working late into their twilight years. “There are no such thing as a free Botox ,” he says.

He said the new normal is not that people are working past 65 years, it is that they are looking for a second job to make additional money.

Here are the author’s top five tips to survive in the new era of forever working:

1) Don’t forget to take your nutra-pills every day.

2) Buy the latest housekeeping robot.

3) Don’t marry again. Forget the aggravation, get a virtual pet.

4) Find a good dentist and make him your friend. If you can’t chew, you will starve.

5) Buy only good quality human spare parts.

Mahmood Saberi is a freelance journalist based in Dubai. You can follow him on Twitter at www.twitter.com/ mahmood_saberi.