Whenever I received an invite to a boring official dinner there would also be a not-very-subtle hint to me to dress properly.

At the bottom of the embossed invitation card would be a note that said I had a choice of either dressing appropriately or to wear my national dress, which was even more off-putting as the national dress was known as the ‘bandh gala’ or ‘closed collar’.

In the hot and humid nights of this region, it is not easy to keep a smiley face and stop from choking on a chicken lollipop while wearing this dress.

I also did not own a sherwani, a long, coat that went down below the knees, as it was cumbersome if you needed to go to the toilet in a hurry. You had to be tall, stately looking and most probably sport a trimmed beard — and not someone short with spindly legs — to pull off wearing this dress. (It was also not fashionable at that time to have your name embossed on your coat).

I hated wearing a tie as my eyes would usually pop out since I never could tie the double-knot properly.

I was reminded of this predicament when I read a report recently that French mayors wanted to ban burkinis on 30 beaches in France.

Burkinis, as you know, are swimsuits that cover the whole body except the face, hands and feet, for those who are modest and do not wish to wear the high-cut one-piece or two-piece swimsuits.

I thought the burkini was a great idea for fashion swimwear, especially if you have cellulite and do not wish to overshare personal stuff to the public, like some people do on Twitter and other social media.

Political statement

But to the fashion police, a burkini is a political statement and had to be gotten rid of as fast as possible. There was even one unfortunate incident where a woman was forced to take off her burkini top. It must have been not only humiliating but also nearly impossible to take it off.

I wear a swim shirt in the pool so as to not look like burnt toast. The shirt fits snugly and is sort of waterproof, but taking it off after a swim requires contorting oneself like a circus gymnast. I have pull it off my back and quickly put the elbow in the arm hole and so on while it stays stuck to me like a second skin.

Now I believe that some American airlines are insisting that passengers dress “appropriately” when taking a flight. Which is a good thing as you do not want such people leaning over you as they put their luggage in the overhead lockers. When you purchase a ticket, you are legally bound not to wear “clothing that is lewd, obscene, or patently offensive.” You can also be taken off the flight if you wear a T-shirt with a political message that the airline does not like.

When I took my first flight out of the country everybody was dressed as if they were going to a wedding. The men wore tight, uncomfortable suits and ties and never took off their jackets even after the pilot put off the seat belt sign.

Women would be dressed to kill and carried a small case that was known as a flight attendant’s make-up case.

When I once travelled in business class, the stewardess got me a pajama suit and I had to get into the tiny, cramped toilet to change and that took a while.

During a recent 14-hour flight all I was given was a pair of socks. I took off my shoes, which was a mistake as my feet sweat a lot, and then put the socks over my socks.

Mahmood Saberi is a freelance journalist based in Dubai. You can follow him on Twitter at www.twitter.com/ mahmood_saberi.