1. Be mindful of ... your goals
Being mindful about goals, ambitions and dreams means bringing them into your present, instead of letting them float somewhere in your future. Adam Zargar is an empowerment coach for 2b Limitless (050-5093212, info@2blimitless.com). He says, "Being mindful of your goals encourages you to do something important for those goals every day and keeps your life in balance."
Be present: "Make a CANEI list - which stands for Constant And Never Ending Improvement - of five goals. Before you go to bed, write down a specific measurable action you plan to do towards each goal the following day. At the end of the week, month and year, look back and see how much closer you are to achieving your goals."
2. Be mindful of ... your relationships
Do you give the important people in your life your undivided attention when you are with them? When they talk, do you really listen? Alaa Abuali, counselling psychologist at Synergy Integrated Medical Centre (04-3485452), says, "Being mindful in relationships requires you to accept what is happening in the present moment and to actively listen to what the other person is saying without judgement."
Be present: "If you notice your mind wandering to the past or the future," says Abuali, "focus on your breathing and bring your attention back to the person, how you are feeling and how your body is reacting to those feelings."
3. Be mindful of ... your water consumption
The UAE is guilty of a water consumption per capita rate that is three times higher than the global average. Instead of worrying about it abstractly, be conscious of water wastage while you are actually using it. As part of their ProGen Campaign, Procter and Gamble (P&G) conducted a survey about water consumption in the UAE. Yassin Attas, director of external relations for P&G, says, "A shocking 22 per cent of people do not believe that their actions can make a difference. The baby steps we make today add up to a huge difference tomorrow, and may guarantee fresh water for our children in generations to come."
Be present: Only turn on the shower when you are actually getting in; cover your swimming pool when you aren't using it; use a water-efficient shower head; don't leave the tap running while you wash dishes, your face, or your teeth; and opt for a top-loading washing machine.
4. Be mindful of ... the moment
The concept of mindfulness stems from the Buddhist practice of mindful meditation, whereby a person uses meditation to focus their mind on the present without judgement of themselves. Mindful meditation is thought to reduce stress and anxiety and is often prescribed for people suffering from depression and mood disorders.
Be present: Helen Williams, counsellor at LifeWorks Counselling and Development (www.lifeworksdubai.com), says, "Take one deep breath and pay attention to yourself in that moment. Scan your body. Become aware of your posture, how you are feeling, what you are thinking and, as you breathe out, relax and soften into the moment. Afterwards, attend to the needs you noticed during your body scan... for example, drink some water, or relax any muscle tension you felt. Try to do this with one deep breathe at regular intervals throughout the day to bring yourself into the present moment. It's a great habit."
5. Be mindful of ... Your connected addiction
When was the last time you went a whole day without checking your phone or your emails? Dr Saliha Afridi, who is opening her own clinical psychology clinic in Dubai this month (salihaafridi@gmail.com), says, "We are all so used to being connected 24 hours a day that we can't live without it - and it distracts us from what we should be focusing on. If you are playing with your kids, but on your BlackBerry, are you really giving them your full attention? It's easily done - I find myself doing it, too. But there was a time when we used to leave the house without mobile phones and the world still turned. We may be more efficient now, but we are less mindful, less content and less connected as individuals. In order to really connect with the moment, we need to disconnect from our electrical devices."
Be present: "Take electronic holidays," says Dr Afridi, "where you are not using your phone for a few hours at a time, and then aim for not using it for a whole day. See what difference not being distracted by your flashing phone makes on your ability to be present in the moment."
6. Be mindful of ... your breathing
Leo Babauta's blog ZenHabits (zenhabits.net) was voted one of the top 25 blogs in the world last year by Time Magazine. Babauta urges people to slow down, breathe and be mindful. In one of his most popular blogs, simply entitled ‘Breathe', Babauta says, "Breathing can transform your life. If you feel stressed out and overwhelmed, breathe. It will calm you and release the tensions. If you are worried about something coming up, or caught up in something that already happened, breathe. It will bring you back to the present." He finishes off by saying, "If you are moving too fast, breathe. It will remind you to slow down, and enjoy life more. So breathe. And enjoy each moment of this life. They're too fleeting and few to waste."
Be present: Babauta advises putting the word ‘breathe' on your fridge, or as your screensaver on your laptop, to remind you to take a deep breath every time you see it.
7. Be mindful of ... your emotions
Central to the concept of mindfulness is the ability to take an uncritical look at yourself. Williams from Lifeworks says, "Learning to step back and observe your emotions and thoughts without judgement is fundamental to the practice of mindfulness and enables us to begin to find clarity, peace and calmness within ourselves."
Be present: Williams says, "Spend ten minutes every day sitting comfortably, focusing on your breathing and just allowing your thoughts and feelings to be what they are without attaching any judgement to them. Don't be surprised if you start to greatly enjoy the experience of non-judgement. It feels like freedom!"
8. Be mindful of ... your eating
It's easy to eat on auto-pilot, for example when you're having dinner in front of the TV, or munching through a box of popcorn in the cinema. When you do this, you aren't giving full consideration to what you are eating and whether you really want it or not. Emily Cheyne is a lifestyle consultant and owner of Know How Group (www.know-how-group.com, 050-3732684).
She says, "Many of us eat out of habit - because it fits into our day, at set meal times - or for emotional reasons, like boredom or stress. Also, we often pick at food while it is still in the packet, or eat it straight from the fridge. These habits make it easy to overeat without even realising it."
Be present: Cheyne advises making it a rule to put food on a plate and sitting down to eat it; only eating when you are hungry; and pausing between bites. She says, "When eating, tune in and see if you are still hungry. If you eat when you are not hungry, you are using your body as a dustbin."
9. Be mindful of ... walking the Earth
Mindful walking, or walking meditation, is a well-known meditation exercise. Buddhist monk, poet and author Thich Nhat Hanh says, "When we practise walking meditation, we feel deeply at ease, and our steps are those of the most secure person on Earth. All our sorrows and anxieties drop away, and peace and joy fill our hearts. Anyone can do it. It takes only a little time, a little mindfulness, and the wish to be happy."
Be present: Next time you are walking outside, take the time to look around you and feel the sun and air on your skin. Notice your breath and how many steps you take for each in breath and out breath. Choose one of the following phrases, or something similar, that matches with the number of steps you take per breath and silently repeat it in your head while walking: for two steps - lotus flower; for three steps - lotus flower blooms; for four steps - the green planet; for six steps - walking the green planet.
10. Be mindful of ... parenting
It's all too easy to be distracted when you are with your children, rather than giving them your full attention. Gonan Premfors is the founder of Parentology (www.parentologycourse.com) - a parenting coaching course that aims to help parents cultivate meaningful relationships with their children. He says, "If we are not present in the moment - meaning we are there physically, but not with our soul and our mind - we are not there at all. We won't notice, see or be with them. They need us as a whole and we need to be with them as whole."
Be present: "When your child is telling you something, for example, about what happened at school that day, show them you are really listening by articulating what is going on and being curious. This doesn't mean you should ask them fact finding questions, but honest curiosity... How did they feel? What did they learn? If that happens again, what will they do?"
